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Author Topic: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute  (Read 10922 times)

Offline KLag

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Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« on: July 31, 2011, 05:07:42 PM »
So I need a bit of advice regarding my neighbors - they are a couple (as far as I can tell) and are constantly fighting.  I could deal with it if I thought it was simply that, but every time they fight, I can clearly hear either slapping, choking, or screaming coming through the walls.  In the past two weeks, it has been happening almost every other night, sometimes it's gone on for 3-4 nights straight. 

I have called 911 numerous times, but the cops never show up, and the fighting (bellowing, bloodcurdling screaming on her part, walls being slammed into) goes on for hours because it is unchecked.  Today it was so bad I could hear her screaming hysterically at the top of her lungs from my kitchen, and it could be heard in the street below.  No one else seems to be concerned, and as far as I can tell, I think some people think she's screaming during sex.  I'm their neighbors, and there's no way in hell they're having sex.

 Is there any other resource I should be calling besides 911? Should I call the precinct directly? I just feel like it's going to be brushed off as a lover's quarrel, and that something much worse is going to eventually happen.

Offline Clearview

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #1 on: July 31, 2011, 05:11:15 PM »
call Vallone

Offline daisy

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #2 on: July 31, 2011, 06:02:14 PM »
I would call the local precinct and 311.  If they don't help you, I would call Vallone.  It sounds like this woman is in some serious trouble, and at some attempts should be made at help.  Of course, it's up to her to accept it and some women just don't until it's too late, but I'd say call the local precinct.  311 may also be able to put you in touch with battered women's shelters or other support systems for this kind of abuse.

mjones222

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #3 on: July 31, 2011, 11:48:48 PM »
can't help those who don't want it.....have u seen any bruises on her/him? Any evidence at all? Did you call 114pct or 911?

Offline JoeyC

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #4 on: August 01, 2011, 01:05:50 PM »
Is it more a noise issue than a domestic abuse one?  To call it in as domestic violence if is not would be spiteful and wrong.  Leave then anonymous note, unless you would be only one who would hear them. 
Last place i lived i had same  situation, got pissed off. It was both of them, trying to scream louder than each other a lot.   I knocked on door during  fight (Which was stupid, I should have waited till it calmed down)   and I said, to be nice "Your tv is way too loud, it's keeping us up"   They got hint, looked shocked  :smiley:    It solved problem, but go with what you feel most safe doing.

Offline Starwind51

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #5 on: August 01, 2011, 06:33:18 PM »
http://www.nyc.gov/html/ocdv/html/home/home.shtml


Good luck.  I was hoping to find a phone number.  Not a brochure.  Not a video.  Not a press release.

Offline KLag

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2011, 09:12:13 PM »
Thank you everyone for your responses! I still didn't know what to do, so I figured I might as well call 911 (for old times sake, plus I'm so comfortable with it at this point, so whats one more call?).  The cops DID end up coming about a half hour later, and they arrested the guy and the woman filled out a statement after he got loaded into the cop car (yelling and being an asshole to the cop, what a shock).  First time I ever saw the couple, and they ended up being in their 60s.  Really very sad.  Roommate came home in the middle of it and told me she had to call 911 the night before due to the same bloodcurdling screams, which is the first time I realized that at least someone else is hearing/acting on all of this besides me.

Offline JoeyC

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #7 on: August 06, 2011, 12:20:58 AM »
Thank you everyone for your responses! I still didn't know what to do, so I figured I might as well call 911 (for old times sake, plus I'm so comfortable with it at this point, so whats one more call?).  The cops DID end up coming about a half hour later, and they arrested the guy and the woman filled out a statement after he got loaded into the cop car (yelling and being an asshole to the cop, what a shock).  First time I ever saw the couple, and they ended up being in their 60s.  Really very sad.  Roommate came home in the middle of it and told me she had to call 911 the night before due to the same bloodcurdling screams, which is the first time I realized that at least someone else is hearing/acting on all of this besides me.


You say they were constantly fighting. Does that mean it went both ways? If so, you did wrong.   If they were just arguing back and forth, and guy was arrested due to fact you were upset over noise you did very wrong.  She filled out complaint, but in anger, or cause she was hit? 

Offline Mer

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #8 on: August 06, 2011, 10:22:31 AM »
The did the right thing, KLag.  It's not your job to figure out exactly what was going on over there.  All you know is that you heard some disturbing s**t.  You rightfully, got the police involved.  It's their job to figure out what's going on.

Offline kempsternyc

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #9 on: August 06, 2011, 10:59:46 AM »

You say they were constantly fighting. Does that mean it went both ways? If so, you did wrong.   If they were just arguing back and forth, and guy was arrested due to fact you were upset over noise you did very wrong.  She filled out complaint, but in anger, or cause she was hit?


So the OP should of just sat back and deal with it???? I doubt the cops arrested him just for the fun of it.
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Offline essen

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #10 on: August 06, 2011, 06:56:56 PM »
If people are screaming at the tops of their lungs and slamming things and breaking s___ and it sounds like they might be killing each other, it's fair to call the police. While it's true maybe neither of them had any intention of truly hurting the other person, not only is it really disturbing for neighbors to have to listen to, you also have no way of knowing if one of them actually is going to end up dead and then you're left feeling guilty that you didn't bother to report it and something terrible happened. Someone involved in the fight could be too afraid to call the police, so a neighbor calling in could be their only hope of safety. If they are harmless to each other aside from screaming and slamming stuff around, they should learn to express their anger in less violent ways if they don't want the police called on them.

Offline JoeyC

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #11 on: August 07, 2011, 12:06:10 AM »

So the OP should of just sat back and deal with it???? I doubt the cops arrested him just for the fun of it.


In possible  domestic dispute, burden is on arresting husband.   Cops make arrests to look active, not for  any sense of justice. 
If he beat her arrest him, for sure.  Originally it was noise complaint, and OP was saying they wanted noise stopped.    They were in 60's, have they been fighting like this for 40 years without any violence--possible.  She may have been signing a report, not a complaint.  If this was done as way to solve noise from neighbors, that is wrong is what I meant

Offline KLag

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #12 on: August 07, 2011, 10:11:42 AM »
Noise is one thing, but when I can hear the woman going from talking  to gurgling because (I can only presume) he's grabbed her by the throat, or hearing her talking/yelling stop when I start hearing slapping and him yelling harder, you'd better believe I'm not calling the cops simply because I want the noise to stop. 

About a week and a half ago, I woke up because the guy was just yelling obscenities.  I listened to hear if I heard her, but nothing - he was just talking to himself.  Annoying, so I put earplugs in and went to sleep.  I can put up with noise - I will not put up with someone else harming another human being.

Offline JoeyC

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #13 on: August 07, 2011, 01:12:43 PM »
ok, but in origional post you said some thought she was screaming during sex, and that it was back and forth.
Is he back ?

Offline Redsalt

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Re: Neighbors Constantly Fighting - Domestic Dispute
« Reply #14 on: August 07, 2011, 04:53:19 PM »

You say they were constantly fighting. Does that mean it went both ways? If so, you did wrong.   If they were just arguing back and forth, and guy was arrested due to fact you were upset over noise you did very wrong.  She filled out complaint, but in anger, or cause she was hit?

Why are you defending this guy? Even if it did go back and forth, the cops needed to be called. This just wasn't yelling if choking and slapping sounds were heard.


 

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