Inbetween??? Anyone else?

[lilfootie]

Is anyone else in that awkward inbetween phase in life where you all of a sudden realize that at all of the places you used to hang out you are suddenly hanging out with 19 years olds??? and you're suddenly way older than that?

It's kind of odd and frustrating.  I'm 24 and I got out of a two year relationship a few months ago.  I didn't realize until recently how much I've acutally grown up since the last time I was single.  I feel as though I'm too old to hang out at the same places I used to - they actually kind of creep me out now, seeing all the older men hanging out there to find college girls...  I'm not old enough for potential love-interests to take me seriously (i get the "oh, you're still so young, we really don't want the same things"), and yet I'm no longer interested in the 20 somethings who live off of their parents and party all the time. 

Where do people my age go?  The ones who don't miss keg parties and one night stands???

Also - do any of you have friends who refuse to go out in astoria?  My best friends will come over and hang out, but won't go out to bars or dinner here.  And I want to explore so badly!  Drinking alone is just not as fun.

[BigBryan]

Let me know when you find out.

Seriously though - there are different venues appealing to different demographics. Indigo may be nice for your demo. Also have you been to Rapture ? Check out some of the Astoria Mixers and there's somewhat of a range as well as other Astorians gatherings like wingtacular.

Things could be worse - you could be older.....

[casicua]

25 years old here, and it's not necessarily slim pickins here, but it is hard. I find a lot of people in the area are into their cliques and seem to have a set group of friends already.
A majority of my friends either live in Manhattan or Brooklyn, and a lot of them make the effort to come up here once in a while, but for the most part, I'm out there. I like Astoria, but I would definitely be more inclined to go out here more if my friends would. Come to the next singles mixer, whenever that is- it was a fun time last time.
I definitely feel the same way about the bars here. I'm sort of past the overcrowded club/drinking sh!tshow scene, but too young for the old fart bars. I think (neg nods, here we come) that the lower east side and Brooklyn are the scene for us folks now. Despite all the talk of hipster culture, there is a good selection of places in those areas for people in our position.

[dennmart]

So where does that put me, being 27?  :-(

I have to admit, in the few months I've lived in New York City, I've noticed just about the same thing: People with their own set group of friends, places where I either feel too young or too old, etc. It's pretty difficult to mix in when all of your friends and family are far, far away (Puerto Rico, in my case) and starting anew is not easy at all. Now that I'm moving to Astoria this weekend, I'll make sure to swing by one of the Mixers in the neighborhood, so thanks for that suggestion.

[AAPA]

Have you tried the park? Must your activity require alcohol? If you bring a drink to the park make sure to put it in  a inconspicuous container. Maybe you're growing out of the bar scene in general, because really after a while it's not that cool.

Put in in perspecive. Your're in your early teens and you and your pals score a bottle of cooking cherry from your aunt Janice' house. You puked on the carpet, but hey... your cool.

Later teens; look at you now you've made it to some sort of university and your freaking smashed! OK, you think you're cool. Three years go by and now you've got a little bit of a gut, but your cool.

Your 21 or 22. Your kicking it at the bar, you've got a girlfriend, you've got a mustache, your the coolest.

Your 24. You've been at this bar a hundred times. You're friend shows up and you get drunk, every once in a while you meet some new folks, it's pretty cool.

Your 30 and it's 9:00 in the morning. Your late for work, your head hurts, you smell like an astray and you can't find your jacket. Your jacket's at the bar on the floor; playing it cool.

Your freaking 45 years old! Think about it. Your at the bar and it's Tuesday at 5:oo P.M. Your watching the news! This is not cool. Or is it? I have no idea.

I suggest looking for more intersting ways to fufill your social desires. Like camping.

[newastorian35]

I'm 27 and feel the same way about being too old for some places, too young for others.  I'm usually not into the bar scene anymore, but when I do go out, it's usually happy hour in Manhattan after work.  Lots of young professionals, not too young, and usually not too smashed.  When my friends do drag me out at night, it's usually to the village, which I just find tiring and I always want to go home within 5 minutes.

If you can't convince your friends to go to a bar in Astoria, maybe you can convince them to go to a nice dinner here and you can drink?  Or maybe you can talk them into the beer garden, as I find that even my friends living in Manhattan will come over for that.

And since you posted this in the singles section, I assume you're wondering where to meet people to date?  Well,I don't know, but if you find out--let me know! 

[odenhal]

Thank you all for making me feel old and inadequate   :mrgreen:

just as i was having a good couple days

[EddieStjohns]

I'm 50 and just had a fight with my gf and wished she would move out and live with her brother who is the third spoke on our wheel since he got separated from his wife 9 months ago.  After reading this thread I'm feeling a bit depressed and old so maybe I should go buy her some flowers.

[enigmacat]

I think the best thing to do is take a multi-pronged approach (picture a trident).

1. the obvious - dating sides, speed dating, etc.

2. keep your social life going. meet new people without worrying about whether they are date-able. the more friends you have and people you know, the more parties you will get invited to, and the better chance you have that you have a friend who might introduce you to their friend... etc. And as long as you are single, wouldn't you rather be single with lots of friends?

3. Be involved in whatever you are passionate about. Whether that's PETA meetings, pro-life rallies, or kayaking classes. If you meet someone who shares your passion ... wouldn't that be cool?

Number one is the only thing that you are doing just for the sake of meeting someone. Two and Three are worthwhile and fun whether you meet a romantic prospect or not.

[plank]

can you tell me the places where old guys go to pick up college girls?  :-D j/k

I would suggest checking out some wine bars. there are only one or two in astoria.

they are usually void of meatheads and predators, and the crowd is mostly mid 20's and up professionals who don't live with their parents.

[PJ]

age is just a number.....i have older people tell me that they have better conversations with people my age (25) then people his age (40+)........................

[lizluv43]

I've been inbetween for such a looooooooooong time!!! LOL

I'm a feisty 46 year old with so much energy and love for life.  I love to dance, I love to go out but here's the problem....

The ONLY places to go dancing are loud clubs with very young kids (and the older you get the younger they look).  I've look high and low for a place and everything I find is either too young or too old.  Why aren't there places geared for a crowed that's a little bit older?  It's like once you hit 28/30 it's like you're not suppose to be out dancing you're suppose to be home making babies?  

Is it so difficult to have a place where the music isn't ....THAT LOUD where you can dance and actually be able to have a conversation with someone?

It's nice to know that it's not just me maybe someone should come up with an idea and open a club for the older crowd (not so old, lol).

[Pulled pork]

I've been inbetween for such a looooooooooong time!!! LOL

I'm a feisty 46 year old with so much energy and love for life.  I love to dance, I love to go out but here's the problem....

The ONLY places to go dancing are loud clubs with very young kids (and the older you get the younger they look).  I've look high and low for a place and everything I find is either too young or too old.  Why aren't there places geared for a crowed that's a little bit older?  It's like once you hit 28/30 it's like you're not suppose to be out dancing you're suppose to be home making babies?  

Is it so difficult to have a place where the music isn't ....THAT LOUD where you can dance and actually be able to have a conversation with someone?

It's nice to know that it's not just me maybe someone should come up with an idea and open a club for the older crowd (not so old, lol).

Have you ever been to SOB's in the West Village?  Friday nights they have live Brazilian bands till very very late. Very mixed crowd. Young ones yes but also lots of older ones too. All having fun and dancing close.  Loud for sure but in a very good way. I'd say go with a few friends.  Always men there looking for someone to dance with.

[daisy]

Salsa and latin clubs in general tend to have an older crowd, or a very mixed one.  I would assume swing clubs with the big band playing would have a mixed crowd too.  Patrons tend to be a lot more respectable, there is less focus on drinking and hooking up, and I often have tons of fun dancing all night.  Def try SOBs and the local salsa/swing scene.